This is a part of The Complete Guide to Dealing with your Mother-in-law – Chapter Nine
Nothing is more important than how you think and feel about yourself. If you suffer from low self-esteem (feeling bad about yourself), external situations can affect you in a dramatic way.
Loving yourself can be extremely helpful while you deal with your mother-in-law. It can make you more secure, emotionally strong and independent. You’ll be able to forgive yourself and others easily and nothing affects you too much. You develop a more optimistic and happier lifestyle, and you have high values, character and integrity. Nothing can shake away your peace and happiness.
Here are a few steps on how to learn to love yourself:
1. Surround yourself with positive people:
Make sure you have friends who uplift and motivate you. Have a group of vibrant people rather than gossip mongers. Do you have someone who is always enthusiastic, vibrant and positive in your (distant) family? Make friends with them. You can learn more from them and can catch on to their habits quickly.
2. Appreciate yourself often:
Take 2 minutes every evening simply to write down a list of things that you love in yourself. What are the things that made you proud today? Write them out. Read them once and feel happy. This will help you to love yourself and notice the positive traits in you. This will pave the way for feeling stronger.
3. Learn to spend time with yourself:
Instead of depending on others, spend time with your self. Go on a shopping spree along, simply take a walk, listen to music, or just meditate. Read good books and explore yourself. Constant talking and interacting with other people tires your mind out. Sometimes you need to be with yourself.
4. Do something creative and new:
Open up new possibilities to your life and be stress-free by doing something new every day (or at least every week). Feed the birds, paint a landscape (even if you have never painted), play with children, volunteer in an orphanage or take part in a marathon.
5. Compare you to yourself, not others:
Even if your mother-in-law compares you to others, do take her seriously. You are not living others life. It’s your life and you have to design it however you want. You should be your comparison. Remember that you are a unique and special creation of this universe. It’s not worth comparing yourself to anyone.
6. Eat healthy & love your body:
Respecting your body is the first step to loving yourself and improving your self-esteem. Eat healthy and green. Stay organic. Exercise every day. Wake up early and take time to meditate or watch the sunrise.
7. Focus on looking neat and presentable:
Even if you are a stay-at-home woman, don’t just stay in your boring night pants all the day. Being beautiful, neat and presentable makes you confident. Take time to look elegant. I am not suggesting that you take out your best dress and wear it at home but you should definitely make some effort to look clean and hygienic.
8. Make mistakes, let go off perfectionism:
Perfectionists tend to be too critical of themselves, if you are one of them, it’s time to let go of it and make some mistakes. Accept yourself. Take calculated risks.