The Ultimate Guide on being a Good Wife

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Whether you are newly-wed or known each other since 10 years, it always pays off being a good wife. I have seen women who believe that a good wife is someone who “listens to her husband” or worse, “sacrifices herself to make her husband happy”. Unfortunately, these kinds of women only create a lifeless marriage for themselves. They end up feeling like a machine. While compromise is a necessary step in a marriage, it doesn’t mean that one has to sacrifice everything to make her husband happy. In fact, a study actually concluded that men like women who stand up for themselves. So let’s dive into out topic on how to be a good wife to your husband.

I have divided the article into 5 sections. Physical sense, emotional & verbal sense, in love, in a career and spiritually.


Take care of his health

Sure, a man can definitely take care of himself and his health. But it will be sweeter if you do it sometimes. Little deeds of responsibility go a long way. You can do tiny things to make him healthier, especially if he’s a workaholic. For example: Maybe you can cook him a gluten-free meal once a week. Give him almonds and nuts everyday along with his breakfast. Make sure he drinks water while at home. Keep a water bottle next to his table, and encourage him to do the same at the office Encourage him to exercise. Especially if he’s a night owl, help him by waking him up in the morning to go to the gym.(But don’t force him) Treat him occasionally if he’s regular at the gym. Send a generous amount of vitamins into his body with some quick and healthy juices and smoothies. Once or twice a year, book an appointment for a complete body check-up for him. It’s not so tough, is it??  Yes, you might be busy getting your kids ready to school or searching for your office papers. You might be busy with your meetings, friends and vacations. But tiny acts of love do make your marriage worth it. Taking care of his health shows responsibility and love. Trust me; your husband will love you for this sooner or later.

Be natural:

Be yourself and be natural. Men are attracted natural, spontaneous and presentable women. Loading yourself with a lot of makeup might not impress him. Makeup is not bad; enhancing your appearance with makeup is great, but painting your face and lips to look like a completely different person is not cool.

In fact, many men love the way women look immediately after they wake up… Fresh and cuddly. So be natural, be yourself. Sometimes when you are in a bad mood, show it out. Cry on his shoulder. When you are in a good mood, dance with him, have fun. Don’t just go on either of the extremes. Don’t be too aggressive, don’t be too submissive either. Have a balance.

A Clean Home:

A women with good housekeeping skills is definitely a loved by her husband. Keeping your house clean and neat will not only impress him, but also keep your mind happy and calm. A house with clutter is bound to make you restless and you may be prone to fighting. Home hygiene will also prevent many diseases.

If managing the home is a big task to you, then hire someone to help you out. After all you are not a machine and remember, no human being is perfect. Whether you do it yourself or hire someone to help, make sure the house is clean.

Clean Home = Clean Mind = Clean Relationships.


The way to a man’s heart is his stomach goes an old saying. And there’s some truth to it. Preparing a meal for a man is an act of love. Cooking and feeding your man is an incredibly nurturing gesture, almost motherly.  Show him love by cooking his favourite food once a while. If you hate cooking and you have a someone to cook for you, at least feed him sometimes.

Sexual Life:

One of the most important things in a marriage is sex. That’s the time and place where you both can share your inner most love and intimacy. Remember, sexual pleasure is very important to a man, just as emotional nourishment is to women.

Men struggle a lot to communicate express their love through words (that’s what most women fight about) His affection and love is shown through sex. Understand the importance of sex for a husband. He’ll love you for it.

Sensual Massages:

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As a marriage progresses into 5th or 7th anniversary, sex becomes quite boring and a routine. You might have an incredible sex once a while. But the next time it becomes a routine again.

The importance of touch has been neglected often by couples, leading to bad marriages and boring sex lives. Touch is something much more than skin-to-skin contact. A right touch can clearly communicate assurance, love, safety and help couples bond for a better life of togetherness. Make sure you touch, pat, hug a lot.

And a spicy way to touch is to give your husband a sensual body massage. Explore his body; Use any body lotion or aromatherapy oil and give him a good massage once a while. Hug him at least once a day. Kiss him before he leaves and after he comes back home.



Accept your imperfections:

To be a good wife to your husband, accept your imperfections. Don’t be too precise and nit-pick each and every detail of your married life, whether positive or negative. Accepting your imperfection shows that you are a humble woman and yet confident one. Acceptance is the key to happiness.

Develop friendship:

Be his buddy, although the title says ‘How to be a good wife’. Friendship is really important in your marriage. Share how your day is. Tell him your secrets, just as you would do when you trust your best friend. If you share a hobby, then spend a day or a vacation doing what interest you both. I am sure every couple has some interest in common.

Try matching your hobbies together even if you don’t share a common interest. If you love wildlife and your husband loves photography, go on a wild-life safari. You can enjoy watching the animals and he can click as many pictures as he wants.

Be practical and realistic:

Many men complain that their wives live in the dream world. Especially, women have a lot of expectations when it comes to romance and marriage. Ladies, stop daydreaming about the perfect prince charming who rides you away on his horse. This is reality. Neither you nor your husband is perfect. No marriage in the world is perfect, either. Every couple goes through fights, bickering, romance, love, kids. That’s how life is. If you are waiting for your husband to give his fullest attention and love… well, I’ll have to say that you are over-expecting. It’s okay to expect love, but not okay to expect him to love the way you want. You husband’s love to you is unique and so is your marriage.

Accept his lifestyle:

I know it’s a bit tough in the beginning, but you’ve got to accept his lifestyle. Don’t try to change him, unless you want your marriage in ruins. A compromise is okay.

For example, let’s say he’s a party animal and you hate parties. He can go to the party while you can stay at home. Or you can attend 3 parties out of every 10 he attends. That’s a good compromise. But totally not letting him attend parties in the rest of his life just because you hate them is absurd. Accept his lifestyle.

Stop nagging:

Women nag because they feel men do not listen/follow what they say. So many women keep telling the same thing over and over again. Ladies, please don’t do it. If he’s not doing something, do it yourself. If it’s something you can’t do, then forget about it. If it’s something really important and you can’t do it, your husband will do it. He’s not an idiot. He’s intelligent enough to earn a hundred thousand bucks a year and take care of the family. Do you think he can’t manage something as trivial as a flight ticket or worse, cleaning garbage? Men hate nagging, Full Stop.

Don’t strangle him emotionally:

Making your husband emotionally overwhelmed, blackmailing him, abusing him using your emotions, emotional infidelity or emotional abandonment is a huge NO.

While men are quite famous for sexual assaults and domestic violence while the poor women take the victim role, very few people are aware of the fact that women can also be a threat to a man in a marriage. Unfortunately, some women don’t realize that they are emotionally abusing their husbands.

Right Communication:

Marriages fail most of the time because of lack of communication or communicating in a wrong way. Many psychologists have emphasised the importance of communication in a marriage. So don’t take it lightly. As a wife, communicate with honesty and patience. During any fights or problems, make sure you are using the right words, politely. Its important to fight fair. When he comes back home after a long day greet him with love and kindness, not with a set of complaints. Don’t keep reminding him of his past misdeeds. Get over it. Bad communication and bad choice of words can hurt a person terribly. So think before you speak.


Surprise him:

Give him little sweet treats of unexpected surprises. Tell him how much you love him. Occasional acts of love are essential. So go on and surprise him with a love letter, dine together under the stars or sing a song for him.

Read: How to surprise your husband

Share your moments:

A journey through the happy and sad moments is what makes a marriage worth it. Share your happy and sad moments and encourage him to do the same. Bad mood? Cry out. Angry? Let him know. Feeling romantic? Kiss him. Bored? Go on a fun date.

Grow together in love:

Grow together wiser and better by practising honesty, trust and dedication. Respect your husband. Never ever put your husband down under any circumstances. A good wife respects and supports. Men are also quite sensitive. So don’t think that the words you speak simply bounces off them. Marriage is a commitment. It’s a win-win situation. So take it seriously.

Get silly and creative:

Don’t be caught up in work, home, kids all the time. Men do love dedicated women, but you can break the rules sometimes. Let your inner child out. Get silly, tease your husband, kiss him. Get creative with love-making and romance. Become like a child sometimes. Your husband will love the immaturity in you if you display it rarely. But make sure it’s only once a blue moon, not every other day.


Be independent:

Yup, men love women who stand up for themselves. Get a job, and stand up for yourself. Be that dynamic lady everyone respects. Have grand plans for your future career. Help him financially (if you feel like). Share each other’s dreams, help his dreams come true. Grow in your career. Have a leadership attitude. A case study recently proved that men are more likely to be attracted to women who are career-oriented.

Balancing Work and Home:

The best wife is someone who balances work and home efficiently. Learn to achieve a balance between work and home. Too much focus on work is not good for your marriage, while too little focus on your work might not be good for your career. If you are unable to manage your home, then hire a maid.


Spread out the Positive vibes:

Making your home a positive environment can be wonderful. All you have to do is do good and ‘think’ good. If you are a person who believes in God, then pray every day. By being positive, you give a positive influence over your husband’s life and home.

Being a wife is a responsibility. If you are a good one, it not only makes your husband happy, but it will make you happy as well. You’ll enjoy a long and blessed married life once both of learn to understand each other’s responsibilities.

Action Plan: Take a new step today by taking care of your husband’s health. Feel free to comment on what steps you have taken today to improve your husband’s health (or what steps you took today to be a good wife).